“People are not good to each other”
Crooks and thieves:
I’ve fallen off the wagon yet again. Not the narcotic gravy train, but the amenable social wagon. My negative disposition in life keeps me sober when it comes to keeping on the social straight n narrow.
Friendships, relations, cohorts etc. etc. etc. keep us all socially drunk with yet another purpose. It is healthy to remind oneself every so often that social affects more often than not, are fleeting. I’ve wasted too much time on cheaper women and cheaper wine.
Again I call upon my negative mental disposition or what I have come fond of referring to ‘as just being a dick’ ‘.
I have worked diligently at cultivating friendship be because having a friend is a rarer occurrence than a normal man might admit. “People are not good to each other. ” Friends some times treat each other lower than people. I’ve managed to hate with the most general and confusingly accurate dispersal. I’ve cockishly or consciously allowed only a few to my premiere party at the center of the universe, where respect is learned and you can’t get through the front door without acknowledging the definition if the situation, my first name and formal introductions.
Trust is a word with less social value than race.
Trust is after all, just another complex belief system.
There is a universal understanding of this very scary and lonely distrust of others. In our most socially drunken moments; think age 17, your first love or marriage, bringing a child into the world, or when god is in your side at any given sporting event or positively tragic life event. We get drunk on the good times. But the age of knowing becomes unfaithful, as does Many first loves. People divorce, children grow up and drift away into the madness, and even god loses track of us at the end of our sporting lives. We spend our lives entrusting our idiosyncrasies and exposing insecurities in an attempt at mutual disclosure or friendship. Alas, in an instant personal relations sour and the thoughts, hopes, dreams and burning self disclosure is used to maim.
My path is “where the city sleeps.”
I’ve concluded that our long running philosophical connection may be over. I ask each year what it takes to tell the difference between thieves and crooks. When any crook or thief worth their salt knows good-n-well that whether or not they are mutually exclusive; most of them are both. As they rely on chumps, not unlike myself, to define the absurd, they have already taken advantage of your inattention and stolen a small part of your dignity along with your wallet.
I am a crook. I am a thief. I don’t care which definition is more accurate. For starters, I’ve hijacked the English language. Traditional definitions read more like rhetorical guidelines that give way to new and exciting verbal applications.
I stole your sunshine. I stole your confidence.
No one enters a social relationship altruistically. What do your friends offer you?-What’s your social worth?
Does it amount to trust?
It amounts to a laugh.
My laugh is composed of Every laugh I’ve stealthfully induced. How clever ..taking bits and pieces of your soul without your consent. How many times have I unveiled an identity and held a up a mirror to reveal life’s pockmarks. I can predict the reaction with my statistical imagination. I’m not immune to emotional manipulation at this or any level because at our weakest or most insecure moments we Rely on laughter to make sense of it all. looking into the mirror, after avoiding it for so long has a steep learning curve.
My laugh is disarming because it is familiar. My laugh is familiar because its was taken from you. I use to be proud if my collection. Denoted by different races and national prowess.